The Mentor in the Mirror
While working as a camp counselor for 9 to 12-year-olds during the summer of 2017, my desire for mentorship deepened. Every morning, I would wake up at 4 a.m. to shower, dress, and attend the daily Bible study for camp staff that began at 5 a.m. My peers and I were hungry to learn, seeking knowledge and a closer connection with the Divine. Timing was critical because the teacher would close the doors promptly at the start time. Latecomers had to either try again the next day or pay a fee to join. He was intense—likely influenced by his military background—but also renowned for his impactful and rigorous Bible studies. The room was nearly always full. He emphasized the importance of learning Greek and Hebrew, maintaining a disciplined study life, and having a mentor or discipler, which he considered essential.
The teacher explained how, in the first century, Jews had rabbis who served as disciplers, and their followers imitated every aspect of their rabbi’s life, from speech to mannerisms, even down to how they walked. To him, imitation was a key part of being discipled or mentored. Remember this idea—it will come up again later in my reflection.
This experience energized me to find someone to disciple and mentor me. I felt it was essential for my growth and my aspirations as a leader. At the time, I was volunteering with a group of youth from diverse backgrounds at a church in downtown Phoenix. The associate pastor and I were becoming good friends, so I asked if he would consider becoming my discipler. Despite planning to move soon, he agreed and suggested we start the process by reading a book together.
The White man I’m speaking of is Chris :)
The book we read was God of the Oppressed by James Cone. If you’re familiar with the book, you might be surprised to learn that my mentor was a white man. Reading the first two chapters was eye-opening for me. It was the first time I had encountered someone writing about the unique experiences of African Americans in the U.S. and their interpretation of the Christian faith. I had never thought deeply about such a concept before. I had assumed that Christianity was neutral and universally understood, indifferent to one’s color or culture. However, it became clear that one’s background and experiences profoundly shape their understanding of faith. Culture and tradition influence not only how people view the world but also how they live out their faith.
I began noticing these differences while working at a predominantly white church. Certain habits and practices from my Black church experience were absent, revealing different values between the two communities. Strangely enough, my mentor saw the African American historical experience and interpretation of Christianity as a valuable gift, one that he wanted to share with me as a young African American. He helped me see that my unique cultural experience was not just personal but also a gift to others. This realization made me reflect on how deeply I had already been mentored by my culture.
This reflection brought to mind what I’ve learned from my friends at Street Psalms about René Girard’s mimetic theory. Girard, a French anthropologist, argues that our desires are not entirely our own; we imitate or borrow them from others. For example, we might desire to live in a certain neighborhood or pursue a specific career path because we admire someone who has achieved it. If this is true, then the question we should ask ourselves is not “What do I desire?” but rather, “Who or what am I imitating?”
For me, mimetic desire became evident when I started leading a youth group. Without realizing it, I recreated an environment reminiscent of my Black church experience. I thought I was leading based on my own ideas, but I was unconsciously imitating a space that had mentored and discipled me deeply. My mentorship process was embedded in my African American cultural heritage all along—I just hadn’t recognized it.
No single culture or group can define what it means to be fully human. When one culture claims this authority, it causes harm, leading to the dehumanization of others. Those who don’t fit into the dominant culture’s definition of humanity often become outcasts. In the U.S., where white American culture is dominant, it’s important to critically examine how its values shape our desires and actions. I’m still wrestling with what white American culture and its traditions mean in my context, but I’ve learned to be mindful of what I’m imitating and to recognize that I’m always being mentored.
I invite you to do the same.
REFLECTION QUESTIONS:
What do you desire, and what does that reveal about what you have been imitating?
Who or what would you prefer to consciously imitate?
Ephesians 5:1 “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children.”
